


Patton Will Fight You

by RLCinderella



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-30
Updated: 2018-08-30
Packaged: 2019-07-04 17:32:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15846018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RLCinderella/pseuds/RLCinderella
Summary: Virgil thought Patton was just kidding when he said he would physically fight him if he didn't talk better about himself.





	Patton Will Fight You

**Author's Note:**

> So, um, here's another fic. You can also find it on tumblr here: https://ijustreallylovesanderssides.tumblr.com/post/172417596566/patton-will-fight-you. I got Roman's nicknames for Virgil from a tumblr post with nicknames people could use.  
> Hope you enjoy!

If Virgil had a dollar for every time Patton threatened to physically fight him, he’d have enough money to buy tickets to a Panic! at the Disco concert. It was just metaphorical though. Patton wouldn’t actually fight him. Or so Virgil thought.

It had been a busy day for Virgil. Thomas had auditioned for yet another play, but due to a flat tire had been late. Virgil was trying to be better at not letting those cognitive distortions Logan had talked about get to him, but he still found himself worrying over the impression they’d made arriving late. The audition had gone okay—Thomas hadn’t forgotten the song this time—but Virgil’s mind always found something to nitpick.

So, here he was, sitting on the couch in the living room of the mindscape. At one time, he would have stuck around after the audition and let Thomas know just how small his chances of getting the part were, especially since the director probably hated him. Then he would have holed up in his room and hid from everyone and everything. 

But that was then. Now, he would take a moment to address his concerns with Thomas, and Logan would come and work through those concerns with the both of them. Virgil knew that all his worries would just be amplified if he went to his room, so instead he would curl up in the living room with his music for a while. 

Even with all these measures, however, sometimes he still ended up spiraling. Why was he like this? He had gone over all of his concerns with Logan and Thomas, identifying all his cognitive distortions. Why couldn’t he just let them go? He was holding Thomas back. 

Virgil jumped when he felt a hand on his arm. He looked up to see Patton standing over him with a plate of cookies. Virgil removed his headphones.

“Oh, uh, hey Dad. What’s up?”

Patton held out the plate of cookies. “Sorry kiddo, didn’t mean to startle you. I just thought you might like a treat, you know, since auditions are so hard on you.” 

Virgil gave a small smile. He really didn’t deserve Patton.

He took a cookie. “Thanks.”

Patton grinned. “No problem, kiddo.” He settled on the couch next to Virgil. “So, how was the audition?”

Roman burst into the room. “It was epic! Sure we had a bit of a rough start, but once he got into the song, Thomas nailed his audition. I wouldn’t be surprised if we got the main role!”

“If the director doesn’t hate us,” Virgil couldn’t help muttering.

“What was that, Virgil?” Patton asked.

Virgil ducked his head. “Uh, nothing.”

“Now, none of that, kiddo,” Patton said. “Your thoughts and feelings are just as valid as Roman’s.”

Virgil sighed. “Look, I already went over all my concerns with Thomas and Logan, cognitive distortions and all that. Anything else I say at this point will just bring everybody down.”

Patton gave Virgil a warning look. “I will fight you.”

Virgil put up his hands. “Look, I appreciate that you want me to feel good about myself and all, but sometimes we just have to accept the facts.”

Roman stepped forward. “Virgil—”

Virgil cut him off. “I’m serious. It’s pathetic how I—”

It was Virgil’s turn to be cut off, as, with a cry, Patton launched himself at Virgil, sending them both tumbling off the couch, cookies flying in every direction.

Virgil grunted when he landed on the floor, Patton on top of him. “Patton, what the heck!”

Patton settled himself more firmly on top of Virgil then grabbed Virgil’s wrists, pinning him thoroughly to the ground. “I told you I would physically fight you.”

Virgil bucked and squirmed, trying to dislodge Patton, but Patton was a lot stronger than he would have thought. “All right, I get it. Now get off!”

Patton shook his head. “Sorry kiddo. I’m not letting you up until you say five nice things about yourself.”

“Oh, come on!” Virgil looked over at Roman. “Help me!”

Roman grinned. “What’s wrong, Dead Poet’s Anxiety? It’s not too difficult. Just say a few kind words and you’re free.”

Virgil growled and struggled some more, but Patton didn’t budge. 

Logan walked in. “What is going on out here?”

Patton looked up. “Oh, hey there Logan! Don’t mind us. I’m just helping Virgil think a bit more positively about himself, that’s all."

Logan raised an eyebrow. “I fail to see how wrestling on the floor will help.”

“Allow me to bring you up to speed,” Roman said. “Our dear padre has decreed that Virgil must recite five positive things about himself before Patton will release him.”

“Hmm, a bit extreme.”

“Right?” Virgil said. “Logan, get him off of me!”

Logan adjusted his glasses. “I’m sorry Virgil, but although I find the method a bit extra, if it will help you to see yourself in a more positive light, then I have no objections.”

“Oh, come on!” Virgil exclaimed. “It this really necessary?”

“Yes,” the other three responded in unison.

With a sigh, Virgil lay limp. There wasn’t much point in continuing to struggle. He couldn’t break Patton’s hold, and even if he did, the Roman would probably help Patton pin him down again.

“This is stupid.”  
Patton gave him an encouraging smile. “Come on, kiddo. I’m sure you can think of something!”

Virgil looked at the ceiling and thought, trying not to think about the other three staring at him, waiting for an answer, but his mind was blank and they were still looking at him and—

Okay, deep breath. He could do this. He had to if he wanted to get off the floor anytime soon. 

“I lower expectations for social gatherings, so that if something good does happen, it’s pleasantly surprising.”

“You used that in the Accepting Anxiety video, but I suppose we can count it,” Logan said.

Virgil rolled his eyes. They were asking him to go against years of self-deprecation and anxiety. He wasn’t going to be very original. And Logan had given him an idea.

“I’m the one who made Thomas double and triple check things he needed to study before taking tests,” Virgil said, looking directly at Logan.

Logan lifted an eyebrow. “Really?”

“Well, now you’re just being difficult,” Roman said in exasperation.

“Now, now,” Patton said. “It’s still counts to remember and review good things about ourselves.” He cut off Virgil’s smirk with a serious look. “Just don’t do it as a joke. As long as you use them as a valid, meaningful reason, it’s okay to repeat ones we’ve used before.”

“Whatever,” Virgil mumbled.

He went on to use Roman’s and Patton’s examples from the video, but that still left him with one more.

“Come on, Pat,” he begged. “I’ve done four. Isn’t that good enough?”

Patton shook his head. “Sorry kiddo, but you’re not getting up until you give all five.”

Virgil groaned. “This is cruel and unusual punishment.”

“Yeah, because learning to love yourself is totally a bad thing,” Roman said.

“Easy for you to say,” Virgil mumbled. Roman was literally Thomas’ ego. Of course he didn’t have trouble thinking well of himself.

But then again, who better to imitate then the very embodiment of self-love? What would Roman say in this situation? Not that Roman would be in this situation because he wouldn’t need to have Patton literally tackle him to say something nice about himself but—

Focus. He could do this. Just one more and he was free. Roman was very proud of his looks, and while Virgil didn’t necessarily like how he looked he did have a reputation to uphold so…

“I rock the edgy, emo look.”

Patton grinned brightly and threw himself down on Virgil to give him a hug. Virgil definitely did not let out a surprised squeak.

“See, I knew you could do it! I’m so proud of you.”

“Patton,” Virgil wheezed from beneath him. “Can’t breathe.”

“Oh! Sorry, kiddo.”

Patton rolled off of Virgil, allowing him to finally sit up. Virgil straightened his hoodie grumpily as Patton looked around at the cookies strewn everywhere, crushed from their scuffle.

“Oops! Looks like I’m going to have to make another batch of cookies.” Patton hopped up. “Oh well, I guess that’s just the way the cookie crumbles.” He looked down at Virgil. “Need help up, kiddo?”

“I’m fine,” Virgil said as he stood. “Go make your cookies.”

“If you say so. Just remember to be nice to you,” Patton said, ruffling Virgil’s hair.

Virgil half-heartedly batted Patton’s hand away and Patton bounced off cheerily to the kitchen. 

“Well, now that’s over I have some research to do.” Logan said, before sinking down to his room.

“And I have an epic quest waiting for me,” Roman announced, then paused. “You will be fine, Virgil, won’t you?”

Virgil ducked his head in embarrassment at Roman’s concern. “Um, yeah. I’m good. Go rescue your damsel or prince or whatever.”

Roman brightened. “I shall return victorious. Until later, Sad’s so Raven!”

Virgil shook his head with a small smile. What a bunch of dorks, but they were his dorks, and he couldn’t be more grateful that they had accepted him. Maybe things weren’t so bad.


End file.
